How can I move on when I'm still in love with you? --The Man Who Can't Be Moved, The Script
I already told myself it's gonna be a bye-bye. I want to free my mind and heart from any thoughts and feelings of her whatsoever. I am strong, I can endure. Or maybe not. *sobs*
I tried to make a distance. I tried not to text. I tried to concentrate on my academics. Sometimes I look at other girls. I tried to forget her. But her absence seems like to be her presence. Her lips, her eyes, her voice, her everything. They are all there, always.
I don't want break my promise. Because I know in the end this fight, my fight, is nothing. But what I only ask, if she only is reminded, is not to give me any hints, so I won't hope.
I'll be fine, don't bother. Just please don't smile anymore.
the story ends like this;
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(Thursday, November 20, 2008-) +9:35 AM]*
# My First Week At School-
Obviously that was last week. Hmm, honestly I wasn't that excited this semester, especially on the first day, because I knew all along that it would be just self-introduction, orientation on the class rules and whatnot. Now I wonder if that's a part of the curriculum in every semester start. Is that a CHED mandate? Maybe.
I just felt the feeling of being a student when it was Wednesday. When I was late. When I took my first absence this sem. When I had my first lab activity in college. When I got to stay around again at either the student's lounge or the library (yeah, boring!). When I attended my first class on Marketing (MC 4) and Research (MC 3)--my majors. That's the time I realized that it's the second semester of SY 2008-2009 (I swear it took me a billion seconds for me to realize that).
the story ends like this;
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(Friday, November 7, 2008-) +9:20 AM]*
# Why Can't I Move On?-
I said I quit. But not totally.
Last night, I went strolling with my friends. Something was telling me to go with them. Masarap ang bawal eh. I did not listen to what my mind had to say. I followed my heart. Just to see her.
Fast forward. It's time for us to part. I knew I should have told her that I haven't yet moved on. That it's hard. That it's impossible. I needed to fake each moment. Thankfully, I managed to control the feelings. And I hope I was not obvious.
We rode in the same jeep as we went home. We were both silent. She talked to me once there, but she just asked about the joke I shared that night. Where did you get that? she said. And that's it. When she reached her destination, she bid goodbye and smiled. What does that mean?
Why can't I move on? I don't know, but what can I only do now is to cross my fingers and to do what I know is right--love her.:'(
the story ends like this;
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(Monday, November 3, 2008-) +10:21 AM]*
# From October 31 to November 2-
I think the best Undas celebration I've been into yet is in this year. Not that sad, but a colorful one. It's something I'd gladly look back for the rest of my life. *tears falling* Why is it that special to me? Uhm, let me just check what happened 3 days ago.
October 31. The MIX FM Halloween Party. It was my first time to attend such because in my clan, we were used to visit at my relatives' pad for some reunion or vacation around this time, or sometimes we'd go directly to the cemetery. Only in this year that I didn't go with them. Filled with orange-and-black stuffs, our conference room was all set for the party. So were we, wearing our costumes. I wore the costume I wore two years ago during our cheerdance competition in school. It was pink, since our team was called 'The Pink Panthers', competing with the 'The Blue Whales', The Golden Dragon, 'The Green Python', atbp. Well, I just recycled it, sayang eh. Erin told me I was Piglet, but that's okay (Piglet is a good on-air name, though). In that, we had a lot of eating, games and film viewing (of course, horror flicks). That was great, really!
Zhaun, Alexy (d'killer), Joemar and me For more pix, click here
November 1. Visit to Tagum. I arrived there by 4 P.M. It was a bit dark already when I rode the habal-habal (the motorcycle version of a jeep). Since it was dark, I decided to have my cemetery visit to my dearly departed father scheduled the next day. I had dinner with my true family. Ow, I missed lutong bahay so much.
November 2. The Official Visit. I woke up at around 7 A.M. Because of the loud calls of the neighborhood. Hmm, roosters need not to work. By 10 A.M., I went to the cemetery to offer prayers and candles, together with my family. After that, I was again introduced to some of our relatives whom I could be with only when I am in Tagum. I bid goodbye late in the afternoon. And I arrived at our house by 7 P.M.
Indeed this 3-day holiday is not just a holiday to rejoice of, but one to be commemorated each year.
the story ends like this;
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euu typedd*: profile
da*boy;
+ name*John Lee
+ school*Holy Cross of Davao College, Sta. Ana Ave., Davao City
+ date/of/birth*January 2, 1989
+ horoscope*Cappricorn
+ email.add*uhmm, confidential??
+ addt'l*taking up AB Mass Communications. I am working in a pop FM station called 105.9 MIX FM in Davao City, RP.
I am also a researcher of Viewfinder, a debate show on radio under the same FM station. Currently, I am busy with writing scripts for segments of Southern Style, a lifestyle magazine show shown on SkyCable South Spot Channel 13.
And eventually an associate producer (excited ko!!!).
just busy with studies now...excited with christmas...
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euu typedd*: stats
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visitors so far since October 1, 2008
Listen to me LIVE from Southern Philippines through 105.9 Mix FM. I am available on my new schedule: Mondays, Saturdays and Sundays, 6-9 AM (Philippine Time). By the way, our station is off from 12 MN to 5 AM for maintenance.
usually online on Mondays, Saturdays and Sundays, 6-9 AM
(Manila Time)
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euu typedd*: calender
calender*
+ Davangels Peoples' Park EB, November 4, 2008
+ HCDC Second Sem Opening of Classes, November 10, 2008
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